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Originally Posted by Vampyr
What really pricks my nerves was that through your entire journal you, you acted as though you were in so much control...and that I was a blundering idiot who had no idea what I was doing. You went as far as to say Dylan and GM were using me. You fail to realize, that every discussion we had (about survivor), was taylored. All the things I said that you considered "stupid", were brilliant. Gosh, you guys have no ideas. Just wait till I post my journal.
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Shut the **** up, seriously.
I wrote the journal as I went in the game. I wrote how I felt. I didn't know at all what people were thinking. My decisions were based on me pretending you were all strangers except Dylflon and Dyne. I just assumed they wanted to vote me out early.
Don't you people realize? If you wrote out a journal of your thoughts, you'd have to be happy about everything you did. This is a personal journal, so of course everything's exaggerated from my perspective. That's the intention of it. It's a firsthand view from MY perspective.
You can think it egotistical, the views, but that's part of the voice of a journal. I don't feel bad about myself, so I don't lie to myself and try to act humble about myself. I never planned on posting this for all of you to see until I was voted out.
I was not leaving GT because I got voted out. But because GM wasted so much time of my life, and because I don't find you people to be very likeable anymore. Look, this whole thread gives me more reason to leave. It shows that even though I gave people a chance to actually see what a contestant thinks when he makes decision, they use it to insult, rant, and rave.
Once again I'd like to emphasize the fact that I had no clue what was going on in the game when I came into it. I was alone in the game. I had no clue what Vampyr planned, and since he played off so well that he had no alliance, I came to underestimate him. But what does Vampyr do? He gets angry that his trick worked!
Vampyr, you wanted me to underestimate you. But then you read my journal and get angry that I did? That's what I posted in my journal... as it happened. I TRULY thought that you didn't know what you were doing in the game. I know that's different now. I didn't make this journal after I found out people's plans, I made it as I discovered things.
I had the hardest road in this game, whether any of you disagree with me or not. And to say that my strategy was flawed, is like saying that the strategies of everyone else must've been flawed. If I had a good strategy, then the people who beat me either had a very good strategy, or I just had not chance to survive.
From MY perspective, GM was an ally. He was the only person I talked to. I was blind in the game, even though I tried so hard.
I joined the game for fun. I expected it to be like Survivor, where everyone would be strangers, and I tried to play the part. What I did not realize is that there was a party already created by GM who got to invite people. I played along, and then I got caught up in the moment. I put my part to help out in the game here and there, I got to have my fun in Umbrella...
What are you people complaining about? Get back to your video gaming. You beat me, and be happy. You beat the guy who cares the least about gaming forums, and cares the most about gaming. I gave it my all in Survivor and tried to stay true to the person who connected with me. As I said before, I'll get over it. I already am. But now it's a new issue... people complaining about my journal.