Is this wrong? - Page 2

Xantar · 10-09-2005, 07:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Professor S

When her crisis ends, the cuddling will stop and she'll act like nothing ever happened.

Now ain't that a depressing thought.

Anyway, I'll just add that I think these kinds of situations depend not only on her and what you feel (or don't feel) for her but also on your general temperament. For example, I am a physically very reserved person. All my friends know that if I so much as hug a girl, she must be one of my two or three very best friends if not my actual girlfriend. On the other hand, one of my other friends is very outgoing. He likes to hug, and he will also often put his arm around a person or hold their shoulders while talking to them. I wouldn't mind if he did that to my girlfriend because he does that to everybody. It's just the way the two of us are.

And then you've got the Europeans who kiss each other all the time as greetings, but that's another story.

Don't overthink the situation, but I do think you ought to consider how much physical contact you like to get in a normal situation. That's a clue to how your interaction with this particular girl is perceived by others (and by her).

Jonbo298 · 10-09-2005, 07:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dyne

If she's your best friend, half the battle has been won. Now you just need to storm the fortress(1)!

(1)Interpret "storm the fortress" as you like.

The fortress of solitude!

Dylflon · 10-09-2005, 09:17 PM

The "fortress" is her lady parts and the storm is...well...you get the picture.

GameMaster · 10-09-2005, 10:04 PM

I don't think anything is wrong with cuddling between friends. The jury hereby finds you innocent.

Ginkasa · 10-09-2005, 10:45 PM

If she's your best friend, you should not try to go out with her if she's already got a boyfriend, unless she starts coming on to you first (in which case, you should tell her to break up with her boyfriend first).

Although, if you two really are best friends, I don't see why you aren't going out. I can not understand why someone would want to go out with someone who wasn't their best friend. It defeats the purpose, I think (unless all you want is sex...I suppose...).

/me shrugs and walks away

Typhoid · 10-09-2005, 11:42 PM

I alos believe the whole general "if you're best friends, why not date?" thing. Because thats what I've told all my girl friends, is that its better to date someone you know, than some random girl you've slurrishly spoken to at a few parties.

But in practice, the dating best friends thing is difficult. Neither of you want to ruin the friendship, and are both scared it wont work. Based on past friendships/relationships with friends.

Jonbo298 · 10-09-2005, 11:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dylflon

The "fortress" is her lady parts and the storm is...well...you get the picture.

o_O Thanks for pointing out what we already knew

Neo · 10-10-2005, 12:15 AM

There is nothing wrong with it. If the boyfriend trusts her then he shouldn't get upset by it. If he does that's his own problem. Not saying you should tell him - no need to risk stirring things up unless it becomes necessary. Both of my best friends are girls (gay ones actually) and their partners know that my relationship with them is completely platonic. I think of them like sisters.

Just be careful that she doesn't start using you as an emotional crutch when things don't go her way with her boyfriend.

GameMaster · 10-10-2005, 01:28 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Typhoid

But in practice, the dating best friends thing is difficult. Neither of you want to ruin the friendship, and are both scared it wont work. Based on past friendships/relationships with friends.

Whatever you do, DO NOT attempt a romantic relationship with her. It may seem like beautiful idea at first, but feelings will get hurt and hearts will get broken.

Soulmates and lovers are not always the same person. It may seem like you guys are destined now, but eventually you will both come to realize that what you have goes beyond friendship, beyond lovers. It's forever. And that's something more valuable than all the money of the world.

DimHalo · 10-10-2005, 01:57 AM

I would like to comment on the dating your friends thing:

Keep in mind that women are not always as innocent as they may seem in the friendship situation. There is a possibility that there is, or had been at a time, some other motive. While this is by no means a generalization for all situations. It does occur, and more often than one might think. So, even if a girl seems like she is just your friend she may have something else in mind.

Dyne · 10-10-2005, 02:20 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jeepnut's slave

I would like to comment on the dating your friends thing:

Keep in mind that women are not always as innocent as they may seem in the friendship situation. There is a possibility that there is, or had been at a time, some other motive. While this is by no means a generalization for all situations. It does occur, and more often than one might think. So, even if a girl seems like she is just your friend she may have something else in mind.

I agree.

You should always be friends first, at the very least.

DimHalo · 10-10-2005, 02:22 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dyne

I agree.

You should always be friends first, at the very least.

Totally agreed. It is the best way to really get to know a person.

Xantar · 10-10-2005, 02:22 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jeepnut's slave

I would like to comment on the dating your friends thing:

Keep in mind that women are not always as innocent as they may seem in the friendship situation. There is a possibility that there is, or had been at a time, some other motive. While this is by no means a generalization for all situations. It does occur, and more often than one might think. So, even if a girl seems like she is just your friend she may have something else in mind.

Well, the guys have some news for you: it's the same for us.

*runs away*

Dylflon · 10-10-2005, 03:01 AM

Tee hee.

/me runs away also

Crash · 10-10-2005, 03:45 AM

I dont think it is a good idea. But you know what, if I were the other guy, i'd be pissed at her, not you.

You can cuddle, all you want... she should tell you no, if not, than ... *shrugs*

all I can say, I sure wouldn't want my girl cuddling with anything but me...